Puguntha veedu ( The In-laws House)

The inlaws concept has always fascinated me. ofcourse not that i found one lately. but i observed an interesting parallel.

It struck me this morning while in office, trying to work on my summer project( unsuccessfully though). see what summer projects can do to u. u can get all the ideas on thw world except abt what shd be done abt the project!

the situation is woefully similar for the two persons in question. one is the newly wed girl who moves into the puguntha veedu or inlaws house. i make the assumption that the girl is a house wife. the other is the fresh graduate who walks into a company. bit unsure of the company atmosphere.

believe me. this analysis is interesting. both have very much the same road ahead as they walk into the new family (or company) ahead into their careers of married life(or job).

The Maatu Ponnu or Daughter in Law

The daughter in law steps into the house valathu kaal inside first! the guys family members carefully take the bahu inside ( with that kyun ki saas bhi effect)! she is slowly introduced to every member. she has to smile at everyone whether she likes or not. now this is interesting really. in case of a tamil wedding, @ the reception, it happens that u smile at every guy/girl wishing u on the stage for maybe 3 -4 hrs. ur 16 muscles in ur face being constantly overworked. developing sulukku and all. u just cannot get away without any pain in a marriage even if u r the bride or the groom!

then u have to repeat the same puraanam. ur background et al. as u meet new ppl, u r bit unsure. coz some ppl r happy to have u as bahu. some r maybe jealous ( maybe becoz u r either beautfiul than them or perhaps u snatched that guy via love marriage stuff). playing mindgames. and all ppl extoll teh virtues of her hubby. his grt qualities ( even if not any)

now everything has settled. down to a typical day. imagine the plight of this girl. sitting idle can be a nightmare. she either has to make sure that nobody needs anything else. well, i m talking abt traditional girls. intha kaalathu puthumai ponnungalukku apply aagaathu. they r too smart to handle things. and ppl. i wonder they recieve some spl training from college !!!!

so she sits on the sofa. trying to empathise with the zillions of soap characters. glass in hand. ( where else to pour all the tears generated during the course of the soap) . afternoon soaps r too gud. as i happened to read abt it in some other blog. everytime someone walks by the girl, she feels uneasy. her eyes wavers around. hoping that there is not much for her to do. paavam. tough job. if there r any tasks for the day, she has to get them done and probably make sure that the elders ( namely the mother-in-law) get to know that all has been duly completed.

till the moment of arrival of her better half. sudden reassurance now. After a few days she gets used to it all. gains experience to handle everything tactfully. she knows that she can gradually start easing herself, enjoy big time and yet keep ppl happy. diplomacy. suaveness. what not. i guess one of the things that can really bind a motherinlaw and daughterinlaw are those useless discussions on these faltoo episodes. if there is anything in this univere that they can ever concur, it can only be these soaps.

The Freshie

He joins the company. induction time now. he is given a list of ppl who all to meet and get acquainted with. now ready for the grind. to say good morning to everybody. so many times. that he does not realise that even in afternoons he keeps wishing good morning !!

same crap he utters abt himself. to all ppl he meets. and the company manager utters some crap abt the company culture et al. again every manager looks at him with differnt eyes. like our manager for instance, thinking within himself that we r here for some time pass! yet others with some misguided impressions abt mgmt grads. that they r supposed to know a few things. someone pls enlighten these ignorant souls.

then he is shown a small cabin complete with a comp with internet and a phone connection. now comes the tougher part. he keeps constantly looking around. watching out for ppl. while opening one by one. yahoo messenger. then gtalk. then blog. then orkut. and finally one window on the project doc. simply becoz that alt+tab should get this lone window whenever anybody passes by. and ya one more word doc file too. some cut copy paste on it to give an impression that some fruitful googling has been carried out. the life of the freshie is further complicated by the work culture.. for example the company ceo says we have a very open work culture. what this poor freshie fails to realise is that the cabins have as a portion of the wall a glass portion. and ppl can see right thro it. 'open' work culture that is !!!! and teh comp placed tight in front so that one with a small peep can have a clean look at his comp. so this guy has some ready explanation for his boss any time he might ask him the progress.

finally when the moment of leaving from office comes, the elation in his face is conspicuous.
again just like our new house wife, the guy gradually picks up 'work ethics'. the art of managing ppl more than managing his own work. all the guy needs to do is to get a hang of what keeps the boss going. thats it. just like these tv serials, he can do wonders at the help of his boss with the right dose of flattery.


once the initials moments r handled tactfully @ both home and @ work for these two ppl, then life gets cooler.

politics and skillful diplomacy is a necessary recipe for success for both the daughterinlaw and for this freshie.

how do girls by and large handle things @ office pretty coolly? after all if the bahu does not know the secret of success who else does????