Friday, December 08, 2006

Poor Planning of Time ( PPT)

how can one be happy and sad at the same time?

welcome to Bschool life....to the period most sought after. the placement time..infact the only reason why ppl take pains of CAT n a host of other exams..the dreams of dreams of every Bschooler after u r bored of mugging for exams n thot enough was enough n thot its time to think abt companies, careers n conveniences in contemporary times....Bravo! u hv landed into the drudgery of placement period. endless ruthless sessions of Pre Placement Talks aka PPTs.


after attending around 20-25 sessions around its time for introspection....soul searching ( well def soulmate searching was a better job anyday!)

There is structure even in the most fuzzy n messy of things in the universe. and so one can correlate between the crazy comonalities between the preponderances of ppts that paralyse progressive thinking and promote parochial potentialities in the minds of the many dozen scapegoats scathed by soporific sermons of terrifying tycoons of corporate bharat!

i m not alone. i hv got 57 companions to share our grievances. we are having a ball of a time here....and the exercise of attending such talks is the base for experimenting ur theories of how companies operate in boardrooms. The insider view of the placement talks by corporates in B schools with complete histrionics all included.

know what! its been a long while since i ever posted. i cud not hit on a particular idea. but now. the great indian laughter challenge has been well exhibited by these phenomena occuring in the fag end of the year in mgmt schools across the country..i m literally famished. after 8 hours of torture. 6.5 hrs that too almost continuous with a brk of 5 mins only. i reach my room irritated no less but decide i hv to write sth to vent my anger. btw yeah all of us need jobs. but why do the corporates need to make us pay so much for the same.

Disclaimer:

not all companies had troubled us so much. but some really did. and its abt time that we got a break....(tomm a marathon 6 ppts spanning another 12 hr day i guess)

________________________

So here we are. the time shows 9 am. we were "warned" by placecom ppl that we better be there spot on time. or pay 200 rupiah. without a cycle, n not enough sleep either..we can just limp all the way to som n reach by 9.05 hrs. tell u what, the seminar room is dead calm. very serious i think. no? one peep will show that ppl r showing "Casino Royale" until the HR decides to appear to show what they hv on offer.

so the session starts at 9.30 if u r lucky enough. the ranting starts here. we have picked up a few jargons that has been a striking feature of ppts.

Open work culture:

yes we all know that. means u r open to scrutiny. u better behave in office. no yahoo. no orkuts. no blogs. excuse me IT ppl here even considered asking companies whether they allow employees to allow installation of yahoo messenger. IT makkal thirunthave maataalaa????

Case to Case basis:

one of the best jargons used dangerously by companies when asked abt compensation details. when asked how they wd value work experience n what wd be general slab for say a 2 yr work ex guy....the reply is shot at the speed of (E/M)^0.5! everything is case to case. atleast one shd work for kingfisher or a bacardi so that u can get more case to case benefits.

Performance Driven assessment :

Try asking how long wd u take to move thro the ladder at each stage in the corporate circus show n pat comes the answer that they hv pure meritocracy ( huh..so did we say aristocracy? cant u throw some ballpark figure? ) and whats more the fastest it takes from one level to another is 6 months i heard!!!! can u believe it? yeah at that rate the ppl who gave jobs wd have to find fresh jobs in 3 years time!! well....i shd consider taking their interviews!!!!

Dirtying ur hands

and they say u hv to do all donkey work n dirty ur hands. the most abused phrase ( and my fav too) i was left imagining of a situation i always confronted at home....street cricket..i hv dirtied my hands so many times out there on the street....think of it , the likes of reckitt benkiser ( mfr dettol) has good business ahead with such policies promoted by companies.

Analytical Skills:

u need it in plenty. coz they say the job is very demanding. u hv to think on ur feet ( and stand on ur head or what?? Grrrrrrr.....!!!!). and think out of the box. well first get me a box!

Super Jargons: ( IT special)

like integrating all ur applications on a common platform well networked with the rest of teh systms and sandwiched between upper ware, lowerware, middleware , tupperware etc....and leverage the existing potential of the varios capabilities n provide high end visibility of data in enterprise applications for sound decision making....(phew!!!! the effects of sitting in an AC room 24*7 i guess ; - )..what say?

Leadership Programmes :

Like u can be provided state of the art training with rigorous classroom sessions building capabilities( soporofic capabilities)....guess what u r sent to UK, US, Singapore, Malaysia for the same....wonder why go so far when i can sleep even standing in a train journey..yeah networking is a must. take a look at fotos with swimming pools et al....we all now know what networking is....

Passion for work :

well instead...we ask the company..how abt some compassion....passion is meant for 'other' things ;-)

well there r many more....but i need to get to work now....i hardly have time for that :(

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Blank Spaces..

i donno....

i hv lost the capacity to blog! i cant find a thing to talk abt. i m indeed depressed abt it. i m feeling more clueless abt writing blogs ( much more than even writing my exams)

but..

i will return..soon..keep watching this space....( cha..as if anyone cares to read my page..irunthaalum....)

tata

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Timepass?

Whether it is a matter of curiosity or a personal preference, the fact remains that one of the most admired things for me is a library. smaller the better.

almost at the end of the mgmt programme, i have probably never spent much time reading at the library. same holds true for all ppl here. probably the only time the library ever was filled with ppl was when some pics for our placement brochure was needed.

the intertesting thing abt libraries is just about searching for books. i generally enter the library whenever i came too early for some class or when i had to waste time in between classes. i don come with any particular plan for studying a particular book or subject.

believe me gazing at books even more interesting than gazing at pretty girls ( though i m still to find even one such soul, inside SOM..no offence intended to my classmates or the juniors)

i get elated at seeing super thick books with vivid colours and attractive cover pages. if the title is a super jargon, my ecstasy knows no bounds. the thickness of books ushers into me a deep sense of vitality that i shd venture deep into a never ending quest for knowledge. with a strong transparent cover n a silky surface, a book in hand brings in a lot of assurance and so much security into me.

the moment i take the book in my hands and settle in a table, i feel as if i am going to do a thorough research into the topic..as if my future was all going to depend on that particular book. not withstanding that, i take 3-4 books, all of such gigantic sizes to spur my intellectual interests.

with very less time around with classes scheduled ahead, i go thro the wholle book , admiring all the topics it covers, ofcourse, not caring to do a meaningful study on even one topic. what i do achieve is finding a book worthwhile which i can study later. but study later is a tough proposition. it never happens.

nevertheless, it brings so much of good feelings within me. for those few moments, i feell myself to really studious with some sense of purpose in life. once out of the library, and onto the classes, i find my self feeling irritated abt my whole life n what i am actually doing with it all the while.

in short, for someone who is random, arbit , goal less in life n wants to waste time without doing meaningful, but wants to achieve a few moments of unexperienced happiness, a small library is the best bet!

i really bet!

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Travelogue

some memories. bitter memories. sweet memories.

many times it would seem impossible. it was contrarian to my nature.

Till 12th std the luxury of home was not so well understood. Engg made me understand the same. Life was phased to so near perfection.

I am usually glued to home. I hate cinema theatres and hotels and hangouts. someone must be even thinking that i shd have been in and out of existence 75 years before. I was not meant to be the new age GenX dude exactly. While the company of friends was always there, it was limited to specific locations like ur school and playground and a bit of home, both frnd's and mine. social gatherings even beaches was unheard of.

Till mid of 12th, T.Nagar was my abode. the traffic and the buzz around the chennai city can best expressed by this area. Pondy Bazaar was all the more fun. With a 5 min walk from my erstwhile home, and a school in west mambalam, the longest travel i had to make on a daily basis shd hv been 15 mins on a cycle which was all my travel guide ( though nothing remains now..its all borrowed service)

Then due to some issues, we ( family) had to shift to a suburb from where i had to complete the last six months of my 12th. It seemed so painful. all of them. the silence. the distance. the separation ( all class mates in T.Nagar). and worse, catching a crowded bus at 7.45 AM from NGO colony. going to T.Nagar bus stand and then taking my cycle parked at my aunts place close by, to my school 10 mins away across the subway.

If this seemed any difficult, the next was even more. Engg. To think that I was angry with my akka when she asked me to study only in madras seems now to me utter foolishness. after longing to study in a hostel coz my frnds were also in hostels..all my time was spent only in train trips from college to home n back. endless train journeys..every other day, i can imagine myself in the railway station corridor. worry of cancelled trains or getting caught by TTEs withour that superfast ticket. 4 years went slow and painful. i cut short my classes from mon to wed, just that i cud follow those afternoon tamil soaps as well my mom n granny.


Finally i said i m back home. was i?

After a struggle, God's Grace, i got a job. and that too far away from hometown. i never lived away from home on my own for more than 2 weeks( which was just once infact in all 4 years of engg). and i was in the arid regions of gujarat dusting across the petrochemical complexes. first visit home was after six months of joining job. and the next visit after 6 months. and then the last visit after 9 months. for a person who would visit home from vellore given a half day holiday..my life changed so much.

as if it was not all over..i got admission in bombay. again quite far away from madras.

but ofcourse this year only i hv made 5 trips already with one diwali trip pending. that looks like some record travelling. thanks to a couple of sponsored trips n a couple of urgent trips, flying saved a lot of time, while burning my pockets deep.

next year again, i m not sure whether home is far or near. Though parents will atleast be there wherever, i keep thinking abt our own home, our verandah, thenamaram, vaazhamaram n naarthangaa maram n all. and ofcourse my dear overhead pump which i so religiously primed even in deep sleep!

thinking back, from a non traveller, i graduated to a near nomad.

time will only said whether i m going to graduate from nomad to mad or get lucky enough to have a long awaited homecoming at the sweetest place back on earth.

That is Adambakkam.



Friday, September 22, 2006

Opposite

Having an opposite view is the fundamental basis of our lives. sounds like an emphatic but standalone statement?

This statement is true of almost every aspect of life and business. lets see how.

every trade that happens in the world has a buyer and a seller. a buyer has some expectation of the value of a product. and the seller has his own. now their opposite views or opposite take on the value of the product takes them to opposite sides of a transaction. and there is a deal. imagine if everybody thinks the stocks will head upwards, there will be no sellers and when everone thinks the stocks r sure to tank, there will be no buyers. so unless there r opposite views on the underlying entity, there cannot be a trade.

interest rate and exchange rate views affirm this very fact that if there were no opposite views there r no forwards, options or swaps.

this is the beauty of opposing views. after all opposite views r the fundamental reason for existence.

take life. marriage in particular. if everyone thinks a particular guy/girl is bad in a certain way , there is just one opinion and the 'deal' of marriage never takes place. what happens is this, a guy finds a girl good when it may not be the same for most other ppl. again the girl might have a excellent opinion abt a guy while he is actually not acc to most other ppl. so one ends up being teh bakra which is not actually bad.(if both r bakras , their relative pluses n minuses will be factored in). this is becoz again for balance to achieve in one's life, there has to be give n take. without this opposing view, the world will come to a standstill.

this bakra scenario can be compared to the balance of payments ( BoP) concept which infact induced me to write this post.

in a BoP, there is surplus or deficit in a sub account. one surplus in a sub account will be balanced by a deficit in the other account.

a bakra scenario is not so bad really. coz, the minus of a guy will be balanced by the plus of a girl and vice versa. as long as the surplus of one matches the deficit of the other, life is good. this is analogous to the capital account surplus balancing the current account deficit. whnever there is a disequilibrium, policy interventions have to take place ( like internal adjustements of personalites to avoid ego clashes)

if there were no opposite views then all engineers wd go for compsci . and if there were market forces only to exist, would there have been someone working for the larger good?

and if GOD did not think opposite, will there have been Men and Women as well?

Saturday, September 16, 2006

The Logic for our future??

How silly can things get in one's life..?

When the underlying logic of important events in one's life is decided by frivolous parameters what more can u say?

we r supposed to be choosing courses which wd decide our future and u dare to know the "thought process" that go into the decision of designing the future! and yeah the thought process of people who had excelled in their respective fields of study earlier ( with exceptions like the author) and ppl who had decent industry exposure and consider themselves too practical ( big joke!)


first of all, we r a bunch of ppl who have gotten extremely bored with life and decided that nothings gonna improve by a judicious choice of courses.

after completing 25 courses in 1.25 years, no one is in a humour to quench their thirst for additional knowledge if there ever was..and no one is excluded from this, the topper not withstanding. so here is the guide to choosing courses @ som. juniors can learn valuable lessons i m sure.

The Ten 'Som'mandments

1. For ppl who hv no problem getting up early..all pre lunch classes only. afternoon sleep is a must. that too full stretch and under the blanket.

2. For ppl who hate waking up at the crack of dawn at 8 am(like me)..take classes from 10.30 onwards..and ofcourse they will not sacrifice afti sleep also. so take courses which start at 4 in the evening

3. Maximise courses per day. strive for maximum holidays per week and choose courses accordingly. who cares if u have classes 6 hrs a day. anyway sleep in class is assured. especially the ERP room Aesthetics and AC effect is a decent bet!

4. If u r a localite, make sure ur holidays r spaced next to each other. transaction costs to home n insti r reduced.

5. Make choices by prof and not by merit and usefulness of course. after all u want a peaceful life!!

6. Check if the prof gives good grades. that is minimum of AB ( like for sales n distribution mgmt) . prioritise courses by probability of grades expected. yes, u can plot normal curves, fix confidence levels. calculate Value at risk due to unhedged exposure..:P

7. Finance is a big pain. more effort and tough to get grades. take vague courses where prep reqd is minimum. and u can gass off the whole paper.

8. Choose courses so that ur diwali holidays n reqd leave can be optimised. after all u got to spend fair bit of time at home.

9. No courses on sundays as far as possible. after all Huma theatre and the many babes crowding around r not to be missed on sundays!!

10. finally ofcourse make sure the class timings do not conflict with your regular yahoo chats or skype voice chats with ur near and dear ones. afterall networking is the name of the game in MBA!!!!



Monday, August 28, 2006

Rain..

Yet another bore packed session of a vague subject..but with another dazzling display of bombay rains..yeah.... it was raining pretty intensely..all eyes turn towards window view..mine is no exception..

What is so special about rain..well is it really special..?

Rain - The fascination for all ages..continues to enchant everyone from a little kid to a youth to anyone on earth.

A Sign of freedom. Relief from boredom.

Rain is there for u . and for all those around u.

Rain for kids. Rain for romance. Rain for life. Rain for joy. Rain for sorrow. Rain for togetherness. Rain for solitude. Rain for properity. Rain for disaster. Rain for brain. Rain for heart.Rain for mind.Rain for soul.

Does it touch every breath of ur life?

In rains , u can be cold and hot at the same time.

A student loves rains for postponing exams. A professional for taking that odd break from a monotonous life. I love rains for that sleep inducing climate esp when in my hostel room. I know i m blessed to have a bed as good as mine.

As a small boy, rains meant beach in my street....where i can exhibit my marine engg capabilities. build warships. conduct ship races. or sometimes, with all those goldfishes finding its way into the streets, make a mini aquarium. play cricket in a swamped street. with water splashing all over ur face. get a washer from a passerby bus.

u can have all the showers from the heavens. with thunder and lightening. a moment of fear. but also the moment for being near to ur dear.

u can feel Nature's power, when u run for cover. listen to the thunder. get struck with wonder. u don need a skype or a satellite for communication with nature.

why do i get happy inside when it rains outside?

why this simmering feeling of liberation? or is this all mere abberation?

There is no escape from rain. I know it.

It rains not just outside. It rains right inside my heart.



Thursday, August 24, 2006

Hero

The dilemma of every individual ( like me..LOL!)


well captured by Darren Hayes in his Tension and the Spark Album. Song : Hero

HERO...

Outside comfort in the skin
I am all that you're projecting
Inside feel the rising tide
And the revolutions deafening


I was trying to hide my opposing side
Trying to reconcile my Jekyll and Hide


Ladies and gentlemen listen up please
I don't want to be your hero
(No, I am not open.... parts of me are broken)
Do yourself a favor
Save yourself
Don't pick me find someone else
(Why'd you want to bother.... find yourself another)

Sometimes you put all of your desires in an object of affection
But in time because you idolise there is only disappointment
I was flying so high in your perfect sky
But I needed to fall cannot have it all

Ladies and gentlemen listen up please
I don't want to be your hero
(No, I am not open.... parts of me are broken)

Do yourself a favor
Save yourself
Don't pick me find someone else
(Why'd you want to bother.... find yourself another)
Ladies and gentlemen listen up please
I don't want to be your hero
(No, I am not open.... parts of me are broken)

Do yourself a favor
Save yourself
Don't pick me for someone else
(Why'd you want to bother.... find yourself another)

Don't need to compromise
I don't need to occupy the floor
There's a danger in boxing in my sin
And all that I am..

It's too much pressure
I'll only let you down again
(No, I am not open.... parts of me are broken)
It's too much pressure
I'll only let you down again
(Why'd you want to bother.... find yourself another)

Ladies and gentlemen listen up please
I don't want to be your hero
(No, I am not open.... parts of me are broken)
It's too much pressure
I'll only let you down again
(No, I am not open.... parts of me are broken)
Ladies and gentlemen listen up please
I don't want to be your hero
(No, I am not open.... parts of me are broken)

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Bored..

Why does one need to get bored in life? First if all, what does one mean by the so called phenomenon of boring.....?

well, try as i might , cant uncover this mystery of boredom..ppl can get a zillion reasons for not getting bored...quite natural, so is there a way of having as many reasons for getting bored??

a deeper introspection does not help much either..well to make yet another unsuccessful attempt at this intriguing concept..i was bored all day yesterday..i had so much to do ..yet!

then boring is not a phenomenon related to activity or the the lack of it. but then counter argue saying that those activities which were supoosed to fill ur time werent exactly enthusing perhaps? "Managing new business models in a knowledge economy" cud be hardly a way to escape boredom. what determines 'enthusing' or not? its relative..so is boredom!

so the first plot is ..einstein rocks not just in relative motion but also in relative boredom..

Lets say Boredom = f(interest, time, activity, blackhole)

Blackhole???

blackhole is matter which is no longer compressible....if i did get my 10th science text right..why bring poor blackhole in our obscure discussion?

can boredom be equated to black hole? lets try....when boredom strikes u, u cant do anything..absolutely..u try doing diff things..but then one is too bored even for trying..this is coined as " bore to core" when we say core, it means core. and core is related to blackhole.

again what shd one do to get out of boredom....the misconceptiion is fighting against boredom..

wallow in it..indulge in boredom. boredom is a virtue not vice.

get bored. get thoroughly bored. go still deeper. how much more can u get bored. more? but we just said boredom is relative. yes. sometimes u come across relatives who can bore u to infinity. thats why boredom is also relative.

but think again there is a philosophical twist to boredom.

boredom is the state of dynamic inactivity. becoz u r searching what to do. yet being inactive.
this philosophy takes root from spirituality. the state of inaction in the mind is the starting point for release from this material nature of life. so get bored.like me.

i m bored. cant write anymore.
so i log out. and continue to get bored.

hopefully i hv managed to bore out a few ppl if they do read this blog.





Saturday, August 19, 2006

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Kite flying

I realise yet again as the schedule gets tougher, the harder its getting to resist from blogging..handling yahoo was easier..

like a wise man said " The only thing i cannot resist is temptation"


I love kiteflying..watching it..just like ur work....u can look at it for hours together without getting bored..nool udarathu namba makkalukku solliyaa kudukanum?

welcome to the kind of kite flying that happens in the closed cubicles of the corporate chambers..strategy means kite flying. kite flying means strategy. no other way. the moment some guy stands up and asks" what has been the strategy of ur company", u r left assured that the rest that will follow will enable u to get a decent sleep, even if u were suffering from loss of sleep the kinds ppl get at this age..

well this term has a speciality in that i never prepared for classes earlier..this time, large qtys oif marks have been mercilessly doled out for class participation and u need to utter atleast some crap in teh class so that u get away with some brownie points..

Designing a strategy for Corporate Strategy course:

Now that we ppl have not been used to studying as much as we do now..its getting a bit harder to change ourselves by 180 degrees..particularly this course demands that we read around two chapters plus two additional readngs and then a very shady case study, do some analysis and waste precious time that could have been spent sleeping in the afti in this inviting bombay climate..and u have other profs also demanding the same..

so what next? we thought..well atleast i surely thought....

i was never going to do so much..hv got only one year to enjoy here, cant afford to waste away so much just for teh sake of such kite flying courses..so meet fire with fire..mulla mullaala thaan edukanum.. i decided..so make a strategy for this strategy course..how to spend as less time as possible without if affecting ur class parti marks..

Its important to understand how the system operates before we try to beat the system..

the process is this..its a tele conferencing course..if u sleep u will show up on teh tv..so anyway u gotto remain awake..the prof enters and almost immediately starts " yes we can start teh discussion"! hey! i thot he was supposed to give a back ground or sth..and he starts the bidding process..

Hands throw up all over the class....now i have never seen this happen..i hv seen ppl only sleeping in all postures possible in this planet..and suddenly as though the world has changed overnight, guys r seen to be fighting for some sidey grades....

so the discussion starts..the prof does remember a handful of guys ( and gals) whom he can call specifically to give their opinion ( right, i m no way one of them)..and the rest might have grey chances of attracting his attention..infact with so much of shoulder flexing, my shoulder musles have become much much better after that dislocation..

Now the teaching assistant of teh prof will sit in one corner, with a sheet of all teh names of teh course participants..as she will go on marking them as they talk..when she is confused abt whther to award marks, she will put a blank face on the prof, who might give the relevant signals for her to clear her confusion..i never noticed her so much before..now that is teh only job i do in the course:))..yeah not to talk of the dirty stares i recieved from her in return:(

now when the guy picks up the mike, he has to say his name and then start talking..and the discussion moves on..first on chapter readins, then additional readings, the clock strikes 7.15 pm..and the prof takes note. says lets move on to case discussion. now there will be two grps who will present the case from their perspectives..

finally abt 10 mins for discussion of class. when the time is over at 8 pm, the prof decided to intervene and present his analysis till8.15, as every one restlessly keeps looking at the lone clock..

now the idea is clear. no one gets to speak more than once in class. sometimes two times. that is all.

its not rocket science to figure out that u don need to do all the readinsg for the sake of talking for 3 mins. read anyONE properly..make notes on it. be the first to raise hands and utter whatever comes to ur mind. be sure to add words like strategy, perspective, add value., re engineering, grwth rates, profitability and the like ( just like "nadula, kanmani..ponmani.. ellam potukko") to make sure that u r not talking of heaven and hell.

no need to study ANYTHING ELSE. thats all. we know how to take care of ourselves i thot.

i m not selfish. i shared the strategy with my frnds. reducing tehir burden too. the best results happen when we all read different readings. coz, few ppl will raise hands for a particular reading discussion, and all of them can speak and get those marks. and so on.

it worked. yes it did. last three classes i confidently went for class without doing much for teh class. everything was moving on fine.

take teh cue. raise the hand. the moment u get ur mike, say ur NAME LOUDLY. look at her if she takes note. but make sure u turn back to the prof, or it will send the wrong signals;)

u din study @ all? try this instead..take the mike.." Sir, I m Aravindan Krishnan.." now look at the scoring lady to chk if she has taken note of u ..without a second thought, immediately pass the mike to teh next person.. :)) ....ppl actually do this too....

so all was well for some time. and then.

last class, i was too tired to study ANYTHING. the class was all abt vision, mission etc. so usual crap i thot. two chap reading were there, which i din read , then in half sleep enough to manage a sentence or two on the additional reading . a case study that i gave up on..and off to class. first 30 mins was good. though i din speak. i hv enough time i thot.

then the prof said , its time for a surprise quiz. topic? that bloody additinal reading i read in half sleep and the case study i totally gave up on..

now what can u do abt this....i m not worried abt the obscene marks i will get in that quiz..

i m searching for the next strategy already..

Monday, July 31, 2006

Full Circle

Atlast!!!!

It happened!!!! i am a relieved person.

I was a disillusioned lot for quite some days..the events which used to happen a year back were not happening and certainly i felt something amiss in life.

No longer. i m back..yes i m truly back!!

Well aravindan, without his string of lafdas would be reduced to a mere mortal. and that was my only worry all these days. and today i feel a sense of achievement ( or non achievement to be precise)

After two years of waiting, i had made up- my mind to file my tax returns. atlast. i was feeling proud within me as if i was doing a grt favour to the govt. well i was. but not as much. i had my stake in it. the givt owed me a refund on the extra TDS that the company had deducted in my monthly pay cheque. and today was believed to be the last day for filing or sth!

Before we bite the meat of the story, a short intro to the strange relationship ( oh..once more) with my company. while i had a grt time when i was in job, the company had a terrific time with me the moment i had resigned. To give a little idea, i put in my papers 7 days prior to completion of the appraisal period for the year. and that was the last straw. my performance bonus for the year was scrapped. and my appraisal form not even handed a cursory look..i had put my case for escalation which bore no fruit..then they din send the F16 ( not the fighters, i mean Form 16 for IT returns). Finally my provident fund cheque is yet to reach me after a year..hopefully it will be done by the weekend..wats more, for the forms to reach me, i had to bombard the presidents and sr, exec vice presidents for the way in which the company handled ( or mishandled me)..and in 2 days the forms reached me..

So it is quite apparent that there was not love lost between me and the company..and i can tell u we have not seen the end still..

So here i am. waiting to file my returns.

so after a rather insipid lunch, i headed for teh bus stop..my mobile was down on charge..
i realised that i din know my bank account number ( it had changed recently) . called karthik and before i cud get it, my mobile got discharged..waited at the bus stop for almost an hr! form not yet filled..no account number..mobile discharged..super jaathakam..

finally landed up at the IT office..india at its best! loooooooooong Qs....i filled the forms..wrongly..then again..i din have the account number as yet..

i tried my discharged mobile..it was on..for 5 secs..just saw a message from karthik..just as i read the a/c no in 3 secs, the mobile went down..THANK GOD..i din want to hunt for phone booths there..so finally i was shown a long Q..and i stoof there dazed..

we (all ppl in the Q) slowly moved up in life..i mean the stairs and all..

then came the next bombshell!!!! the form needed the bank micr code which i din know..i din have the bank number..and my mobile was discharged! no phones out there in the sec floor..iff left the Q for phone booth again i had to start all over!!! luckily a guy nearby helped me with his mobile....and i had the number of person who dealt with my educational loan..so fortunately got the micr code!!

finally!! after 4 hrs....of wastage ( non utilisation of time for productive activities like blogging, orkutting and chatting)

i was now ready to submit the form..and the lady in charge went thro the form 16 for entering in the system..she gave me a hard look and said..

" ur tax cell guy has not even signed on this form16 for authentication" !!!!

THE END
x---------x



Saturday, July 22, 2006

Not so random..

Perfection in imperfection.

Most of the events are so called random events. i mean there r equal probabilities of occurence. and they certainly dont happen that way. but then thats how the the forbidden energy gap between theory and practice happens. Certainly i m not the one to talk abt it for the first time. What i m saying is just the extension of Mr. Murphy.

For a person who is constantly dealing with probailities and games of chance, noticing this fact is not much of a discovery.

To provide perspicacity to the puzzle, let me try and tie the loose ends.

When it comes to indoor games, nothing beats daayakattai and trade, for me. brain stimulating games dont stimulate me. reason is that brain and me r not so closely related and i m a resigned fatalist. so i believe in the concept of " this too shall pass, everything happens by design, types. so a chance happening interests me more than a clearly enunciated logical sequence, which is actually fallacious considering that an engineering degree was supposed to engrain in me , a logical mind or some such funda.

Coming to daayakattai, for all those like minded ppl who indulgence in this extravagant exercise ( exaggeration??), tell me something..u get a zillion daayams in between the game when all ur checkers are out of the jail and u r trying to catch every possible malai. when u come to the dokku, u don get a daayam for life and stay stuck there. also if getting daayam has as much probability as has five or six, then why is it that one gets more fives than daayam? and why does one gets more pandayam when u r inside pazham? when u need a two wwhich is one of the most easily arrivable score, u get 12s, 6s,5s and the 3s and 4s and what not. clearly probaility is not king.

Talk abt the trade game ( or business as some ppl might call), we have this practice of making our own trade game. means we design our own rules, countries, board, colour and the like. while designing the game, sometimes we kind of create power centres by making some countries macho specimens. assume there are 26 countries, u will find that there are certain countries which will ALWAYS rake in more money. does not mean that these are big countries, i m talking abt he frequency of arriving at these places and consequently doling out rents. in our case, i can list 8 places which had garnered max revenue every time we play. so the probability that u arrive at a particular country is not exactly 1/26.

So what are the implications? what does all this mean?

The events point out to a deeper concept. the presence of a superior power which conducts events not necessarily elucidated by man made mathematics. man designed mathematics for conducting his quotidian affairs. the more man tries to do things on the basis of probability, something else tells that there are hidden patterns in everything not readily understood by the intelligent yet ignorant homosapien. he is not meant to be discerning as to understand all the motives of the ALL POWERFUL. so thats where we arrive. life is full of patterns and cycles..

Strangely, i have been caught for a while in a debate with myself, whether all happens for a reason. and every other time, i keep cross validating the statement. and i clearly do not know whether i am for it or against it.

nevertheless, as long as it provides some food for thought..err..food for blog, i m not too worried..nwo its time for another quick game..






Friday, July 21, 2006

Mirage..

Listen to the music
Beating within you..
And you have the tonic
For miseries that leave you blue..

Do you grasp the meaning
of the world it implies..
Memories can be healing
to cool off that extra spice..

For not everytime in life
Do events happen..
Events that cut like a knife
And are more difficult to pen..

The human mind
Is a bundle of contradictions..
Neither does it unwind
Nor does it favour predictions..

Time to stop connecting the dots
Or straining your imaginations..
Random dots dont convey inner thoughts
but only engender hallucinations..

Try not to understand
Strive hard to accept..
Build that power to withstand
The forces that make one erupt..

For, somewhere, searching for your reflections,
You chose the wrong mirror..
A mirror that mirrored your error
Forever..the play is over....

Thursday, July 13, 2006

VIT - Visitor In Transit

This morning i was reclining into my sofa watching the evergreen melodies of MS Viswanathan in Jaya TV's - Then Kinnam.

Daddy suggested that I should go back to my Alma Mater and catch up with my profs. I swore that nobody was going to remember me there as i was a total recluse at college. But Daddy insisted that there was going to be that one prof who was never going to forget me....yeah..he was quite right when he said that..i slumped back in to nostalgia..

Mostly everybody enjoys their college life. even more their hostel life. first time out of home, discovering their liberty, having fun with new friends..the list is endless..and I was an abnormal child..to me exception has always been the rule..if my engg life seemed like a theoretical joke..this MBA life so far has been a practical joke.......

I have very vague memories of my engg life. Infact, only two pictures flash thro when i try and think of those days..one is the train journeys between Katpadi and chennai. The other is the subject of this post.

It was the year of the freshman. The first year sure had so many subjects . worst of them in my opinion being basic civil engg. the best of them was easily engineering drawing. well to provide a caveat right here, I din exactly understand let alone master ED, but it gave me the lone memory of my college days.

The memory of Prof. Singaravelu, the Asst. HOD, Mech Dept.

We did not meet in the classroom for the first time. He was my hostel warden. The first weekend, I had argued enough that I have to go home every weekend and staying out in the hostel on saturdays and sundays was just impossible. He let me go. There were other cranky wardens who swore that nobody was to leave the hostel premisses. Thus begain my first journey which would go on for another four years..

So there he was in our first ED class. he had a hard look at me, the guy who was the most craziest guy about spending time at home. I was wary of him. He looked like a villain smiling at me as though he wqs ready to seek revenge..I was a child in my first year. (trust me, many ppl in my class now, still tell me i am a child at heart :-)..so i was reasonably unsure about his intentions

I was a kind of a split personality.coward and couurageous at the same time. While I wanted to be in the safe custody of my parents during weekends, I was willing to take on my prof even if i was warned of my absence from classes.

The positioning of the ED class was one of strategy. There were two classes in a week. One on friday afti and other on mon afti. Now I learnt very soon that I was never going to improve at ED and decide to do away wth ED classes where we had to sit and practise the drawings. I decided to attend the first two classses of every new chap when the prof will teach us teh basics on how to get the concept onto the drawing. I could then cut that friday off midway, midday and catch the afti express to madras. and if i was going to be bored to get up on monday ( kovai starts at 6.15 AM, which meant i had to leave home by 5AM), I was again ditching monday's class as well.

The strategy for the ED had been promptly worked out. and put into prqctice as well. All was fine until one day, the prof came to my drawing table. He was a bit serious and sternly asked me why i was not attending his classes. He said i needed min attendance to even give the exam. He told me that if i continued my tactics, he was going to talk to daddy. I was not amused one bit and just smiled away. and cut the next two classes as well.

The next class we had a face off {:))}!!!! He was furious but still controlled himself. He told me that he was going to talk to daddy for sure. I was a bit over confident..and gave him my home no without even him asking for it..He said he will call up for sure..Yet another gimmick i thought..

I was wrong..

That week's saturday..i was watching songs in sun tv and the like. a phone call came. i lifted. and a voice thundered.."Prof Singaravelu here..give the fone to ur daddy"! excuse me..i was not expecting this..blame my over confidence..

I meekly surrendered the fone to daddy. They talked for 10 mins. Daddy told me that the prof was not apparently worried abt my ED skills as much he worried abt my damn poor atendance. I decided to accept daddy's advice to attend the rest of the classes. all for attendance sake. ED was a forgone conclusion for me.

I attended all the classes for the next one month. some even on saturdays. I was not spending enough time at home. Finally daddy told me that he missed me, and asked me to bunk the monday's class coz i had attended saturdays class. So i again bunked the following class.

Now the prof really went crazy. he called me aside and asked me whether i was bunking on my own or my father was abetting my actions..i could only smile..i dare not tell him. I managed to scrape thro the univ exam . the next 3 years did not see much of interaction between us.

Finally it was my convocation. I saw the prof standing beside his students - shd be atleast 15 of them in front of the main building. As I wished him..He placed his arms around my shoulder and introduced me to his students " You must have known only abt visiting profs, but i introduce to you, the visiting student of VIT - GOD only knows how he cleared the ED paper after barely attending my classes. All the best Aravindan" He wore a big smile on his face. Basically he had damaged my reputation in front of my juniors - but i liked the term he coined for me - visiting student of VIT.

A compliment to cherish for the rest of my life....anybody disagrees??













Sunday, July 09, 2006

Population is handy..

What is the height of blogging?

when u step in to the cyber cafe and write a post..

right..anyway

i was thinking abt this population "thingy" for quite some time since i started touring a month back..go to the airports see long queues..as middle class travels more n more by air, we hv a serious problem...leave that ..see the rly stns, they need a serious remodelling..delhi metro system was mindblowing..sth to be done in those lines..whats more, we need systems which makes supervision easier and lessens waiting time..huge capacities..

but that is not the subject of my post..

i m in delhi and hv been trying to spend 12hrs to catch tamilnadu exp, its a tough time..but population comes very handy..

for example, to walk from ajmeri gate side of teh stn to the paharganj, it took 30 mins..good crowd. ( bbay ofcourse is the star performer)..

then for teh cloak room, again a long Q. takes a min of 1 hr irrespective of teh time u enter the Q. infact i started remembering a bit of OR abt thoise queing theories with all those random numbers on waiting and servicer times.

go to a hotel, u will be served after 40-45 mins. if u ever wanted to waste time while in transit, India offers u the best solution. population explosion has never been guiven the credit that was due sadly..

think abt it, u need not try shopping, no need tp spend money, just do all the essential stuff ( i mean drudgeries) for ur journey and ur time whizzes by.

one more addon, i got this browsing centre after searching all over connaught place for 2 hours ( i mean 2 hrs seriosly). whats more, i had successfully circled the LIC building and palika bazaar 8 times. everytime i went searching i landed at the same place in different fashions. look at the marvel of indian architectuire ( or marvel at my extraordinary brain)

another 4 hrs to waste away. i m confident of handling it..time to leave for yet another engrossing searching session. soul searching session.haha

tata

Friday, June 30, 2006

The Bigamist..

The summers is over(yeah rains r lashing bbay) .

Some experiences can be funny but frustrating..some so frustrating that u r finally forced to view it funnily. I get glimpses of Bigamy in my summer project!

Bigamy and summer project?

Yes..if anybody is already into thinking in any wrong directions, pls get back..i m not at all talking abt people per se, working in a company. its about a concept ( i hv been inventing too many concepts these days, makkal odha kudukka wait panraa:)) )

To say the least, all through this summer project i hv lived the life of a bigamist :-(

If tam ppl could go back to one of those maadhu cheenu dramas, where maadhu marries a second time, and is working his way thro pipelines shuttling between mythili and janaki, as if he is at both places same time, my situation wd not be entirely different!

The biggest problem with summer projects is living a dual life..u hv to work in the office and if u dont do it the proper way like me, hv to work at home as well..

Alas, I dont hv the luxury of online data updation ( like the ones i studied in MIT, that if i make a word / xl doc at office, hv to mail it to my account to retrieve at home. and vice versa. and i m an aam aadmi, so dont possess those costly pen drives, and i hate using the floppies....

so mail , it has to be..

now whenever i hv serious reviews, the mail fails to deliver or delivers zero k..and i look like a loose bolt of a fused lantern....

the worst part is, at 4 in the morning, when u want to drop down dead, u have to again mail the stuff back to u..and in iit gpo, the thing gets stuck time n again ( one of the most shady mail programmes i hv ever used)..

at times, i fall asleep with comp on, while doing the report, then get up after an hr to shut down the system..and remember that i hv to do trhe drudgery of mailing on to me....

if i take a serious count, i hv never sent so many mails even to my beloved ones, as much as i hv sent to myself....go to office..bus abt to leave at half past five, u start to mail ur work....gpo goes insane, go hare in the brain, run in the rain, take all the strain....and finally left to drain....

now yeah, i hv perfected the art of managing two homes....keep both of them satisfied....work from both places..become less forgetfull....think of both....appreciate, negotiate, satiate....oh this is getting too much....

anyway in a roll, this is all i wanted to say, the life of a project trainee ( minus a pen drive) is much like a bigamist.

btw, why look askance at bigamists? with their management and negotiation skills, there are the true management thinkers....

PS:

I don ofcourse intend to become a management thinker :) and hope that clears the bottomline




Saturday, June 24, 2006

Strange Relationship

I have made it a habit of writing a post when i am about to fall down dead tired....this is what is called mapping of thoughts under sapping of energy.

i hv been thinking lately abt this very simple and difficult to understand thing called friendship. there are many levels to friendship. one frnd had mentioned something on it in a blog earlier, so i don want to arachify the same maavu. instead i would want to describe a different type of friendship. the friendship of mutual opportunism.

the concept is dead simple.

it was sth i had to experience in the 130 km travel stretch between katpadi and chennai central during engg days. perhaps i was taught many things abt life in this 2 hr journey sitting on the doorsteps. in a very cramped fashion. and train journeys have their own way of educating you.

so we (both) used to travel together from college to home. everytime. we shared the same passion. if we r going get even half a day, we shall make it to home. what ever happens. we had different reasons altogether. he had parties and frnds and masti. i had my mega serials to catch up with. and discuss them with paati and amma. one wd ask how come mega serials on weekends? well we usually dont stay in college that longer! we leave by wed evening. and return the next monday. we had practised it religiously. pratice makes man perfect. we were near perfect.

so it was to be.

we were in the same discipline. we also shared the same frustration. flunked jee a second time while in first year of college. so it was sth to relate to each other.

we sat in the last benches. he was nicknamed the son of chemical engg. the HOD's pet. yes he was quite fundu. i was just another guy in the chemm engg classroom. we enjoyed making fun of profs. i was too tired to listen to all the jokes these profs make and yet call it as teaching. he had much less regard for them. sure we did have some axe to grind.

how different can a friendship be?

we had to walk around 1.5 km to 2 km along the track to make it to the railway station. and then a 2 hr travel to madras. we just walked along. we dont talk much. walking side by side for 20 mins. each engrossed in his own thoughts.

we sat next to each other in that little space on the doorstep. faces headed out of the door as if to search for peace outside. the next two hours would be as silent as death. ofcourse except for the random dadang sounds of changing of tracks and the odd whistle.

is it possible for two ppl to carry on a journey as this without a word literally.

and then another time, we do travel. this time we wd be discussing abt life and the unified theory of relativity. how if good and bad were unfied, ppl see it in the same way, there could be peace in this world. and so many other difficult to ponder topics.

we get caught together by TTEs for not getting the super fast tickets. bargain for fine.

we study alone. we rarely discuss even during exams. we only had those bread rolls during those breaks in fortran labs. we devoured sambar and appalaam big time in hostel mess.

during exams, the exam ends by 1pm. which is exactly the same time, we have our west coast exp for chennai. so we keep seeing each other as to when the other is going to give the paper. and when one gives, the other gives it immediately. partners in crime.

ofcourse finally we did our B.Tech project together. i was denies entry in the chemical plant. he slogged big time. then finally i went to his place and finished all those calculation stuff in 2 hrs. the only contribution i made to a month long project. 2 hrs if u call it. we had fun doing them. both of us were interested in chemical process calculations.

there was never a moment, when i thought here is a guy i want to go and hang out with. same with him.

we had a unsaid contract. of giving company to each other and when either of us dint have any!
that was during these train journeys, projects and last bench gossips.

no friendship. no formalities.

the last time i heard from him was 2 years back when he mailed from alabama that he wanted an idea of how we did the project calculations. that was all.

its funny how i thought of him so suddenly.

the contract law says " There must be an intention to proceed into a contract"

there was neither intention in our friendship. and consequently no extension either.

somehow i actually liked this all.

because i believe not all happens for a reason!

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Rewind..

Time for rewind..so much has happened in the last one year..so much more in store by the end of next year.

if i had really enjoyed living outside home it had to be IIT and nothing less. din enjoy it in VIT. enjoyed a bit in RIL for 5 months when i was in nagothane.

but the last one year has been good and different. to start with, with my interview handling capabilities, cud never hope to get an admit. PERUMAL got it done.

but after coming here, there remains the fact that i have become only more confused than ever.
lost interest in studies a bit too quickly. and i hv no idea what kind of job wd interest me at all. did nothing in acads as such. nothing much in extra curriculars as well. stopped reading daily newspapers. spent more time in yahoo and internet. only if my father wd hv watched what i was doing here..i wd be asked to head for home if i was not going to get any better.

i am confused. not my problem only. everyone is a bit confused. i was told that those guys who get into these instis were supposed to have some kind of clarity in thoughts. one more myth.

after a bad year at acads it has been a tiresome summers. travelling more and utilising 100% of the scorching sun. am actually learning life the hard way. i usually do this way.

learning how difficult it is to handle ppl who are so indifferent. how u realise if u have some degree of self dignity, sorry , marketing is not the place for u. many a times, if i had been my normal self, i wd have gone ahead and blasted all those who did not know the meaning of courtesy. but then i had to bear all crap just for this summer project!

a 10 day stint in delhi only made me sure that bbay was a better place any day to live in. and looking at how my cousins have been spread out now all over the country, i stand very less chance of getting a job in chennai. and if the opportunity is worthwhile, it will be a while before i get back to my aam in madras. time enough for that.

the best thing to have happened over the last year has been friends. i never made a lot of friends. i usually stick to the closer ones. but for a change, it as been so different here. the count i made here was adding one equal half to the count i had managed in 25 years of existence. not just the ones who study with me, did manage to make altogether new friends beyond my locus of imagination and get some really good old ones too..

am really waiting for the summers to get over to get the experience of my life. i m very excited abt it. hopefully i shd make it there.


a bit of dabbling with music at times has also been very enriching. my first try at creating some music however bad it might have been. i guess i did learn a thing or two on handling the keys.
thanks to kiran for company.


although i havent learnt much academically, i guess i learnt more from life. there is so much to learn.

my only take from life as i always imagine....the things worthy of learning are those which u learn without even realising that u learn them and in then in one more sober moment of life, u recall and reminisce and relish those memories.

but i am pestered with a question.

should thing happen in life just to be a memory?

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Dilemmas..

Can dilemmas be sweet?

yes. noticed that when i used to handle yahoo chats and fone talks. the dilemma of who will end conversations first?

it happened when i was in surat. din have a mobile fone. so talking to akka was a shy difficult. so we planned weekend yahoo voice chats. every time for atleast 3 hours.

as we neared the end, i will say bye. and will type bye. she will too. and then i will not sign out immediately. 5 mins will pass. then she will say bye againn . and i will say bye. yet again after 5 mins she will again say bye. this will continue..and then we will finally settle for a fresh round of chatting.

again here comes fone convos. we used to talk real lot before her marriage. like everybody sleeps at ten. we will try to sleep but will end up talking till 12. so scenario changed after her marriage.

and i also got posted out of city. so times changed.

and then when i visit madras, we keep talking and updating 7 times a day and everytime for 30 mins. when we r done with teh convo, we decide to hang up..again bye as usual. i wil say bye and wait for her to cut. and she , the same.. its difficult really deciding who will cut the fone.

finally we do. who does, i m not still sure

now things have changed a bit. does not happen that much. cut fones pretty soon without game theory....but 7 times a day and 30 mins is still there....

i miss the dilemma..however..

dilemmas are interesting after all. its time i had some dilemma in life....


Sunday, June 04, 2006

Experience..

One thing I had been wanting to write was some of my experiences. not they r so unusual. everyone has some kind of experience. but there are patterns.

I had mentioned a long time back that there are always certain constants in life even as times are changing..

Something that i had understand out of ( not 'outta') experience. If i were to track my life since class 10, this truth is sth that has stood the test of time.

i mean the kind of decisions i had taken in life.

To crack open in a nutshell, i had taken stands and decisions which were too much for me. Always tried to bite more than i could chew.

Results - Frustrations in the short term. damn frustrations i mean. I could nearly break down but but for PERUMAL. I had come out of all those sheerly due to HIM. Then it becomes history. something to look back on. sometimes pretty fond remembrances. in fact, in the long term, they were boons to me.

Right after 10th, I got a free kit to prepare for jee. and everybody had unrealistic hopes on me that i was going to become some kind of an engineer. to me that time engineer meant building houses. nothing more than that. I did not even hear abt IIT till that time. I had been a pampered child who does not know the outside world or ever heard of hard work.

come 11th std, and some stupid peer pressure caused me to prepare for jee. Despite knowing well that i was chasing shadows, i did the obvious. tried to study. to no avail. magesh and balaji wd probably testify the sleepless nights in teh car garage where we unsuccessfully carried out all our preparation.

But even they never knew that all this led me to some kind of depression. ( actually almost nobody knew this). At nights i used to dream of all mathematical formulae hovering over my head. Literally threw away all jee books. cried. yes, i cried out loud. stopped going to school for a week. told amma and daddy that i was not going to stay at my home in T.Nagar. Decided to pack off for adambakkam for my paati's house. They din have an answer. I was off. They were stunned. They knew me more than myself. So they sent me.

Reached paati's place in afternoon. and suddenly everything looked rosy. Adambakkam in those days was still like a village. i liked that serenity. i was running high fever when i reached there. but everything had calmed down by evening. i relished paati's company. she gave a hot cup of filter coffee and we sat down to watch some tamil serials ( not soaps..those days they were short n sweet with some social messages). within a day or two, i was becoming saner than i was. and in quick time, i was there realising that i was missing classses and went home promptly. i was almost a maniac when i left home for adambakkam. but i had recovered well enough. next two years breezed. din get thro jee. screwed the only entrance exam of the state. but at the end of 12th i realised that a jee coaching had probably made me feel that i had decent grounding in science and maths, which helped me thro my engg and then on.

I know there are lot of people who prepare and get thro easily. they were brilliant. i was not. i failed. i did fail. i even failed a second time.

first learning in life :

Learn to accept failure. The only failure in life is to lack the courage to stand failures in life.

{ and i had too many failures to back the statement :))}

More experiences to come..

Saturday, June 03, 2006

Return to Innocence

Thats not the beginning of the end
Thats the return to yourself
The return to innocence.
..
Love - devotion..
Feeling - emotion..
..
Dont be afraid to be weak
Dont be too proud to be strong
Just look into your heart my friend
That will be the return to yourself
The return to innocence.

If you want, then start to laugh
If you must, then start to cry
Be yourself dont hide
Just believe in destiny.

Dont care what people say
Just follow your own way
Dont give up and use the chance
To return to innocence.

Thats not the beginning of the end
Thats the return to yourself
The return to innocence.

Dont care what people say
Follow just your own way
Follow just your own way
Dont give up, dont give up
To return, to return to innocence.

If you want then laugh
If you must then cry
Be yourself dont hide
Just believe in destiny.

- Enigma

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

The Last Mile..Chapter II

Seasons are changing....life is rearranging. or it seemed so. does the locale have a say on ur emotions?

It certainly looked like that.

A 100 days of togetherness in solitude was a testimony to this. There were ofcourse minor..very minor meetings. like there is actually no meeting. no feeling. just physical stares. many times unawares. nothing more. not even a bit more to be precise. The closest they came to was when they actually accidentally met at common prayers. Prayers have their own wonderful way of bringing together people. usually. but not here. did destiny will? correction. did their destinies will?

They talked for the first time. officially. like making their backgrounds clear. not too many intentions. does every intro need to have a meaning really? a question that has confused many a souls. a question for which answers are hard to find. a search into the infinite space of the mind. oh mind, unwind....

Life is full of introductions. People meet, know, see ppl. knowing does not mean that it shd serve a purpose. knowing means knowing. it can lead to a lot of events. "can" does not mean "should". The problem with mankind is that everytime one knows another there is a tendency to extrapolate events. exaggerate circumstances. aggrevate misconceptions. expedite rejections. wallow in dejections.

Still he was not to fall into the trap. He had been carefull all these years. he had seen ppl fall in. and out. down and out. drought.

But strange are the ways of love. in catching up with someone who never wanted to get into the vague shades of life. and love.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

The last mile.... chapter 1

It seemed like some major celebration. the whole crowd was seated. he was in a world of his own. blissfully ignorant of a larger plan. it was all a part of nature's design. destiny.

The days went by. until the day everyone was to follow different paths. 6 paths to be exact. temporary though. well how temporary is temporary? he left much earlier.he belonged to a different species. she followed much later. it did not matter. they never knew each other. or rather. he did not know her. it was a huge crowd. he easily missed her.

and then nature plays. a small bunch arrives one day. to the same place. and one among them. intuitive glances exchange. he has no idea. yet. the smile passes. so does she.

they never met. never had to. though the group was small. and though she did know him. why should everything happen so fast ?

on the contrary, if things happen too fast..maybe something is not quite right. well..

Thursday, May 11, 2006

What next?

rediff.com can give a zillion reasons for defeat of amma and the returning of dmk to power.

there can be only two truths abt TN elections for eternity. i m dead sure.

1. verdicts r always clear.
2. the principle of - u one time - i one time.

nothing more needs to be said. throw all reasons. into the dustbin.

via my marketing project, i can say that TN people exhibit variety seeking tendency. if anyone wants to check. i am ready to float my marketing survey questionnaire. volunteers please!!

i m not too worried. but curious.

now i m looking forward to see how CTVs r going into enter into BPL families. i guess the brand of TVs ppl will get also be BPL brand only;)

as if BPL ppl needed just this TV for enriching their lives....not education n other useful stuff. TV is all they need. and ppl select such governments. way back in 1971 i guess, anna promised 3 padis of arisi for a rupee. paati told me. n not one padi was also given. pls chk with respective thaathas n paatis for credibility of this info n tell me. pls give me a break now.

well i need a break really. for the next five years!!!!

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

So Beautiful..

Nothing beats Darren Hayes Lyrics....and his voice....so beautiful..
_________________________________
So Beautiful..

Whether I'm right or wrong
There's no phrase that hits
Like an ocean needs the sand
Or a dirty old shoe that fits
And if all the world was perfect
I would only ever want to see your scars
You know they can have their universe
We'll be in the dirt designing stars

And darlin' you know
You make me feel so beautiful
Nowhere else in the world I wanna be
You make me feel so beautiful

Whether I'm up or down
There's no crowd to please
I'm like a faith without a clause to believe in it
And if all the world was smiling
I would only ever want to see your frown
You know they can sail away in sunsets
We'll be right here stranded on the ground
Just happy to be found

You make me feel so beautiful
Nowhere else in the worldI wanna be
You make me feel so beautiful

I have lost my illusions
I have drowned in your words
I have left my confusion to a cynical world
I am throwing myself at things I don't understand
Discover enlightenment holding your hand

You are..

So Beautiful
________________________________________
A Savage Garden Song

Friday, May 05, 2006

Puguntha veedu ( The In-laws House)

The inlaws concept has always fascinated me. ofcourse not that i found one lately. but i observed an interesting parallel.

It struck me this morning while in office, trying to work on my summer project( unsuccessfully though). see what summer projects can do to u. u can get all the ideas on thw world except abt what shd be done abt the project!

the situation is woefully similar for the two persons in question. one is the newly wed girl who moves into the puguntha veedu or inlaws house. i make the assumption that the girl is a house wife. the other is the fresh graduate who walks into a company. bit unsure of the company atmosphere.

believe me. this analysis is interesting. both have very much the same road ahead as they walk into the new family (or company) ahead into their careers of married life(or job).

The Maatu Ponnu or Daughter in Law

The daughter in law steps into the house valathu kaal inside first! the guys family members carefully take the bahu inside ( with that kyun ki saas bhi effect)! she is slowly introduced to every member. she has to smile at everyone whether she likes or not. now this is interesting really. in case of a tamil wedding, @ the reception, it happens that u smile at every guy/girl wishing u on the stage for maybe 3 -4 hrs. ur 16 muscles in ur face being constantly overworked. developing sulukku and all. u just cannot get away without any pain in a marriage even if u r the bride or the groom!

then u have to repeat the same puraanam. ur background et al. as u meet new ppl, u r bit unsure. coz some ppl r happy to have u as bahu. some r maybe jealous ( maybe becoz u r either beautfiul than them or perhaps u snatched that guy via love marriage stuff). playing mindgames. and all ppl extoll teh virtues of her hubby. his grt qualities ( even if not any)

now everything has settled. down to a typical day. imagine the plight of this girl. sitting idle can be a nightmare. she either has to make sure that nobody needs anything else. well, i m talking abt traditional girls. intha kaalathu puthumai ponnungalukku apply aagaathu. they r too smart to handle things. and ppl. i wonder they recieve some spl training from college !!!!

so she sits on the sofa. trying to empathise with the zillions of soap characters. glass in hand. ( where else to pour all the tears generated during the course of the soap) . afternoon soaps r too gud. as i happened to read abt it in some other blog. everytime someone walks by the girl, she feels uneasy. her eyes wavers around. hoping that there is not much for her to do. paavam. tough job. if there r any tasks for the day, she has to get them done and probably make sure that the elders ( namely the mother-in-law) get to know that all has been duly completed.

till the moment of arrival of her better half. sudden reassurance now. After a few days she gets used to it all. gains experience to handle everything tactfully. she knows that she can gradually start easing herself, enjoy big time and yet keep ppl happy. diplomacy. suaveness. what not. i guess one of the things that can really bind a motherinlaw and daughterinlaw are those useless discussions on these faltoo episodes. if there is anything in this univere that they can ever concur, it can only be these soaps.

The Freshie

He joins the company. induction time now. he is given a list of ppl who all to meet and get acquainted with. now ready for the grind. to say good morning to everybody. so many times. that he does not realise that even in afternoons he keeps wishing good morning !!

same crap he utters abt himself. to all ppl he meets. and the company manager utters some crap abt the company culture et al. again every manager looks at him with differnt eyes. like our manager for instance, thinking within himself that we r here for some time pass! yet others with some misguided impressions abt mgmt grads. that they r supposed to know a few things. someone pls enlighten these ignorant souls.

then he is shown a small cabin complete with a comp with internet and a phone connection. now comes the tougher part. he keeps constantly looking around. watching out for ppl. while opening one by one. yahoo messenger. then gtalk. then blog. then orkut. and finally one window on the project doc. simply becoz that alt+tab should get this lone window whenever anybody passes by. and ya one more word doc file too. some cut copy paste on it to give an impression that some fruitful googling has been carried out. the life of the freshie is further complicated by the work culture.. for example the company ceo says we have a very open work culture. what this poor freshie fails to realise is that the cabins have as a portion of the wall a glass portion. and ppl can see right thro it. 'open' work culture that is !!!! and teh comp placed tight in front so that one with a small peep can have a clean look at his comp. so this guy has some ready explanation for his boss any time he might ask him the progress.

finally when the moment of leaving from office comes, the elation in his face is conspicuous.
again just like our new house wife, the guy gradually picks up 'work ethics'. the art of managing ppl more than managing his own work. all the guy needs to do is to get a hang of what keeps the boss going. thats it. just like these tv serials, he can do wonders at the help of his boss with the right dose of flattery.


once the initials moments r handled tactfully @ both home and @ work for these two ppl, then life gets cooler.

politics and skillful diplomacy is a necessary recipe for success for both the daughterinlaw and for this freshie.

how do girls by and large handle things @ office pretty coolly? after all if the bahu does not know the secret of success who else does????